FRIDAY, December 16th, 6:00PM–
It is very worst of the Porcine runs. No smiling piggies here, no tired porkers hawking fad hikes that are simply daylight jaunts, this is the ultimate HOG. This is the Hog Back. And not just the Hog Back, but the 12 hours of Hog Back. The one, the original Hard Hog Run.
And to make it just a bit more hard, to sort out the real runners from the want-to-be’s….This is
The Hog Back 12 Hour NIGHT RUN.
ALL RUN, ALL NIGHT!.
This is the Dusk to Dawn nightmare of climbing up and coming down, and climbing up and falling down. A time when hard is supposed to last more than four hours..and you don't actually have to consult your physician if it does. This is the run people dream of….in their nightmares….any yet, if you are signed up for the 100, or are considering such, why mix in all the sightseeing? Lets just cut to the muddy quick! Come on…..if you can not show up for this, then you are just silly dreaming about running the 100, just an Ultra want-a-be.
As Rob Lahoe said of the Hog's Back….."This is the one that taught me to slow down and pace myself….about the eighth time up the Hog's Back I had to learn something!"….
This year there will be an assortment of prizes and wonderful gifts. AS always…There will be refreshments, and food for non participants. There will dancing hula girls, and performing Pigs. It will all be there. Everyone sitting at the start/finish table will have a great time….while you run on up, and run on down. But we will tell you all about the great times we are having, all the wonderful food that was out on the table and you happened to miss while you ran ……and while we sat on our asses drinking beer, stuffing our faces, and saying stupid chit like 'Gu Jaw!!' and 'Looking Good!'??
But, unlike other events of this nature, it won’t cost you a cent. No, we won’t charge you anything for the pleasure of watching you make a miserable fool of yourself. What a bargain…
As always this is a special kind of independent thing. It’s unofficial. It's not an an event, it's not even a run. No fees, No organized scheme, no signing you life away to be really stupid, just people showing up independently to run the night away.
However, the suggested ‘plan’ is as follows:
1. Show up on Friday December 16, 2011 with what you figure you will need at the bench above the Nature Center before 6:00PM as this is pretty much self supporting outside of water and basics. Park below the gate. Do not drive up to the top other than to drop your gear. Please No traffic after 6:00 PM please as it is disturbing to the residents.
2. As this is all independent and unofficial run you are asked to try and keep the noise down so we don’t attract attention.
3. A log will be provided for those who care to note their loops and times.
4. I, Marv Mango will be at the bench to keep track of runners (I have a new ipod app that I will be using, just as soon as I figure it out…) to help anyone in need, to insult everyone, to laugh at the quiters, and to stuff my face on all food. And finally, I will be trying to see if I can come up with anything more inane to say than 'Gu Jaw' to a pack of people who are making utter fools of themselves.
5. The TWO TIME Undefeated Defending Champion Harald E. PhD. will be on hand before the race to, to give sage advice (Please don't ask him about the Hog's Back…as there is nothing intelligent he can utter on that subject!), sign autographs and pose for pictures.
Come and get you picture taken with the Undefeated champion of the Darkside, the man who has been to the center of the universe, and traveled to the edges of Creation, the man who was lookin good, and did a Gu Jaw over 13 or 14 loops last year despite a bum leg, a member of the elite HURT Patrol….
6. I have managed to collect a wide variety of items to award to people as they finish. Given My oft criticized penchant for disquieting humor participants are warned that the best prizes may not be the last to be awarded, as I may pack it in before the first 'six' is mangoized.
Aloha!!!.. Marvelous Marv Mango